My Wife Thinks All White Guys Are Matt Damon
Credit: Nicholas Genin via Wikimedia Commons
By ZACH NOBLE
I think my wife is face blind.
She, having pretty good taste in movies, is usually a fun film-watching buddy, but when we watched Black Hawk Down the other day I realized the dramatic extent of her impairment.
So we sat down, I showed her some Hollywood hotties and asked her to provide their names, and now I’m sharing the hunky pictures with you, dear reader, because that’s what the internet is for: sharing.
“…Matt Damon?” (more hesitantly this time)
Credit: Medill DC/flickr
“The Bad Guy from Jurassic Park”
Credit: Wikimedia Commons
Credit: Ingrid Richter/flickr
“Or is that not him? You know, he has the sunken-in eyes, long teeth, looks Polish.”
“Young Tom Cruise”
Credit: Gage Skidmore/flickr
Tom Hardy (pictured below, as far as my wife is concerned)
Credit: WIkimedia Commons
Hardy is definitely in Black Hawk Down, but my wife still isn’t sure. I pointed him out every single time he appeared on screen, and she never once recognized him, despite having watched the new Mad Max just a few weeks prior.
So, anyway, what we’re trying to say is marriage is great.
Zach Noble is a Georgetown law student and former journalist. He tweets erratically as @thezachnoble.